Today, on this date, I’m happy to be “ME”

It’s no longer the same after 8th of this month. I know I need to add (+) one more year to my age. But first of all, how old am I? Why am I kept forgetting my age? Why I need a calculator at all time when I wanted to how old I am? Hmmm, maybe because I have stopped calculating it already.

Eight have dominated my life somehow in every positive ways I would say. Somehow, I could be a destiny child for eight. I felt the number so much in me. Maybe, that’s way I got attracted it so much.

I knew everything and anything happened in my life is happened for a reason. The good, the bad, the hurdles, the hard work, the stress, the frustration, the pain, the lost, the miserable, the loneliness, the abusive, the joy carries its very own reason.

To tell the truth, I didn’t really do anything in my life with a concise thought. I was merely following my heart and what is right at that time.

I don’t really give serious thought to anything in my life except when I’m sad.

I don’t enjoy talking about my personal life and feelings to anyone in my life. I love to keep it to myself. I enjoy loneliness in my own way. I love to do self talk. Today, I realised I have lost myself talk in the process of growing up. I’ll die keeping my life only to myself. None, would really know the real me and I like to keep it that way.

I’m glad for staying grounded. I’m glad; I always know the reality of life. I’m glad, I don’t easily get influenced.

Today, I want to thank the MOTHER of NATURE for moulding me to whom I am today. I’m happy I spent so much time of my life with nature instead of people.

I’m happy to be who I am. I’m glad; I’m born this way.

I know I’m unique in my own way. I know I’m being very truthful to myself. I know I’m very sincere in heart.

I know I’m not someone in this society yet. I know I’m not rich yet. I know I’m not there yet where I’m supposed to be. But, I’m happy to be who I am today.

Today, on this date, I’m happy to be “ME”

Besides my flaws, I’m blessed more than I should.

Happy Belated Birthday #tamaka

tatta, (Bubbye)

#tamaka

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Happy Friendship Day “Friend”

“Friend”, who introduced the word to us? When do we learn the meaning of this word? How do we know “the one” is our friend? When do we start to address them as a friend? Do we know the real meaning of friendship? How long it stays with us? Do we still bother about the one we used to call as a “friend”?

How long a friend can stay as a friend? How long the friendship stays as friendship before it’s disappear and fade away leaving no traces.

I’m sure we have come across a lot of people in our life. Only 10% out of them become our friend. Yet, we only allowed few of them to come close to us.

Now my question is, how long does the friendship last longer?

Remember, friendship is like a tree. You need to take care and nurture it with water and fertilizer to keep it healthy and grow. If you have stopped nurturing, it will die eventually before you realised it.

NOW, ASK YOURSELF. How many of you are taking that concise care to nurture your friendship? Does it make it to your priority list? If it is not, I tell you what, there is no point of having this friendship because it will die anyway. Not now, but one day before you realise it, it will be gone far away and you can’t even trace any memory of it.

SO, if you are gifted with few good friends, learn to appreciate them. Make time to nurture your friendship so that you can always sail in the FRIEND-ship while living your very own life.

Trust me; this is only possible if they are in your priority list. I know mine; I’m working hard to be in priority list. If I can’t make it, I know I died trying.

#HappyFriendshipDay My Friends

tatta, (Bubbye)

#tamaka

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[#tamakaTravelLog] A day in Kuala Kubu Bahru #Selangor

Date: 1 January 2017 Days: 2 days

This is my second year of lonely short road trip I did on New Year. This time I picked Kuala Kubu Bahru located at outskirt of Selangor. I always fascinated by this small town that carries a lot of unique things on its own.

This calm village style place is famous for its people, food, dam, river, waterfall, water sports and for its greenery. This is definitely a perfect place for a road trip. I wish I would have had a buddy to boost the energy of this road trip.

Yet, I would say I had enjoyed this road trip to the max. I met two strangers whom on their 50’s and followed them to their relative’s house. This was the highlight of the trip where I’m not sure of what I was doing but I had my most memorable moments at this stranger’s house. We stuck here for an hour due to heavy rain. But it was a perfect timing to enjoy the environment.

I hope I can continue my road trip adventure on every New Year.

Here are some of the snaps that I took along this road trip.

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Move On : The Only Option You Have Right Now

I was sincere. In fact, we were both sincere to each other. Yet, how could this happen? And, why “I” triggered this?
Out of nowhere, something happened. Something pulled us apart. We are separated without fighting, without telling each other and without any reason.

We walked our own path. We never looked for each other. (It could be my guilty concise, It could be his ego)  Time flies. Days to months and months to years. I knew we loved each other; seven years passed by just like that. It was first love to both of us.

I heard he is getting married.  I got those news two days before his wedding day. I’m helpless. I felt alone. I can’t do much about it.  I’m happy for him though. He MOVED ON. He made his life decision and he is going for it. I can only send my wishes to him over the sky.

I spent years asking the “why” question to the sad ending story. I couldn’t move without knowing the reason. One day, without knowing I learnt to accept the fact “it’s not meant to be” and I and he wouldn’t have been who we are today if it is not the way it is.

I accepted the fact. I tell myself “you have to MOVE ON; you have no other option”. Then, I MOVED ON.

I MOVED ON that I do not want look back.

I MOVED ON and learnt to bury the memories.

I MOVED ON stopped looking for an answer.

I MOVED ON and stopped thinking.

I MOVED ON left all the sadness.

I MOVED ON leaving my past behind.

I MOVED ON to be myself.

I’m glad I MOVED ON.

P.s. My past on his birthday. “Happy Birthday”- Remembering the written word in the unsent cards

Tatta, (Bubbye)

#tamaka 

What #5amClub Did to Me?

Image-20170601_225850[1]I know everyone is struggling on this. We tried, tried hard. Somehow it doesn’t work. It’s easy to read than to do. It does require high level of commitment.

Recently, I have been falling asleep to early than usual. I used be an owl that sleeps around 3am. My morning fills with disasters. When I rush, I have tendency to make mistakes. I have well known for being stranded for hours for locking myself inside simply because I forgot the key.

It is a miracle, how I able to hit my bed early and managed to wake up at 4am. This is feeling amazing. Things look different now. This feeling that makes me to think that I have all the time in the world to do my own things before I pack my things to work for someone else.

I am glad; I am walking and not running to get my car. I am glad; I am able to enjoy the freshness of the morning. I am happy; I can play my favourite R&B playlist and have my jamming session. I am feeling fantastic to be able to have these energy boosters.

It is cool that I have plenty of time to dress up and put some make up to pull so called a professional look. To be precise, I have enough time to blend my eye shadows and to perfect the eyeliner and fix the ruined nail colour. Trust me, the imperfection of your eye shadow and/or eye liner is enough to degrade your competency in the eye of social world. I would choose not to wear them rather than to look silly in that way.

I over enjoyed that 15 minutes of chanting, meditation and prayers of spiritual journey that makes my morning extra special.

Importantly, I have time to fill up my tummy so that it does not crack my head exactly at 10am. Trust me, it can drive you crazy.

This is what #5amClub had done to me. It had brightened up my morning. I hope all of you could do the same. What is your secret of motivation to wake up early?

#happymorning

Tatta, (Bubbye)

#tamaka

 

 

Quitting Is the New Future

IMG_20170531_212708[1]I’m in the process of quitting;

Quitting the bad habits;

Quitting the procrastination;

Quitting from slack friendships;

Quitting from wasting time;

Quitting the overspending;

Quitting the excess thinking;

Quitting from being bored;

Quitting from not cooking;

Quitting from oversleeping;

Quitting from having extra fat;

Quitting from “Nasi Lemak”;

Quitting from being night owl;

&

Quitting my office job.

Tatta, (Bubbye)

#tamaka

 

 

My Eight Years Journey Come to An END

It’s my last day. My eight years journey has ended officially. My second home is no longer belongs to me.

That is how I felt on my last day at my ex-company on 8 February 2017. This Company had guided and protected me for past eight years. It had seen me laughing, arguing, shouting, crying and grieving. It had seen the worse of me.

This Company had protected me at all times and refused to let me go. It taught me to be bold and brave. It gave me an angle to cling unto to develop my career. It formed me to who I am today.

I could not imagine where I would have end up, if she failed to hold me tight on my stuff times.

I have met all kind of people here. Luckily, I managed to find few close friends that I can always count on. To celebrate our friendship, SunRaj & Nasi Lemak Bumbung had officially become our “spot” to hang around.

On my farewell, this young Malay lady told me that she wanted to be like me. These words made me to believe that I have done some right things in my eight years journey. It is a wonderful feeling to get to know that I have inspired someone.

These few of my colleagues were so inspiring on their own way. I have no heart to leave them behind. To get rid of this guilty feeling, I bought some token of appreciation to all of them on my last day.

In return, they had a farewell party for me. They made me to give speech which I rarely do. I could not hold my tears and I don’t know why.

They made me shock with their feedbacks on me. They perceive me as “garang” fierce, rowdy, rough, scary and Durian.

Yes, you heard it right, “Durian” which means “hard outside, soft inside”.

I kept telling myself “These are bunch of kids and they are kidding me”.

The best part is the gifts. I got best gift ever.

PIANO –My heart jumped out when I saw it on my table on early morning.

Water Resistant Pens –Do they steal my wish list?

Faber Castle 8 PITT Artist Pens – This is damn invaluable.

Bluetooth Earphone – Damn, how do they know I hate wires?

Ferraro Roche – I love you guys. I really do.

A Vinayaga Statue – A pack of blessings.

Thank you so much guys. You made my day.

P.s I wore my favourite turtle neck “POne” t-shirt on my last day as a sign of appreciation. I am hired for “Pone” and I left as “Pone”. You will stay forever in my heart “Pone”

I chose to share snaps that best reflect the emotions we had on that day.

Tatta, (Bubbye)

#tamaka